UPPER VALLEY HOCKEY LEAGUE

Gamblers Look to

What can we say about the Mustangs that we haven't said yet...they stink.  They stink like West Lebanon on a hot summer day.  Their innaugural season has been ugly at best and despite having a very skilled team, their leadership hasn't done a good enough job managing their lineup each week.  Some have speculated that they are already tanking to make sure they get the first overall pick in the 2024 UVHL Draft, but those people are f'ing idiots because there is no draft.

The Stangs have lost 5 in a row, being outscored 32-9 in that span.  If Dean Youngblood were real, and Dean Youngblood were dead, he would be rolling over in his grave.  Anyone associated with the classic 1986 movie Youngblood should think about suing the Mustangs to make sure they no longer use their logo.

The Gamblers are 2-0 against the Mustangs this year.   The latest win, a 9-0 shallacking on December 13th, was a devastating beat down of epic proportions where "Mad" Max Woods put up 6 points as he toyed with the Mustangs goaltender and defense.  Woods leads the Gambler's with 15pts this season in 7 games, good for 3rd in the UVHL.  They have 6 players in the top 15 in points, while only Schuyler St. Germain(9pts in 6games) is on that list for the Mustangs.

The only thing going poorly for the Gamblers this season is their butt-ugly traffic cone orange jerseys.  They sit 2nd in the standings, *1st in goals scored (* Tuck has palyed 4 less games) and their goaltender Evan "Showtime" Cline has been lights out, 1st in Wins(6) and GAA(2.78).

I keep looking at this roster and thinking that at some point the Mustangs will figure out how to play as a team.  I keep giving them the benefit of the doubt, but they keep letting me down.  I've lost thousands of dollars betting on them, so screw them.  I think the Gamblers win this one by 8 goals.  9-1 Gamblers.

Gamblers Own Mustangs. Win Again.

There were no fans in the stands for this early game. If there were, they would have been treated to some good Men’s League hockey, and I’m not just saying that. Since I was last here on 12.20.23, the Mustangs have added Jeff Colla to the lineup – a solid, good hockey IQ defenseman who plays responsibly in his own end, makes a good first deke and pass, can carry the puck and who can join the play. I’m not saying he’s a Chris Warrington, but he’s a solid addition to their roster and has no glaring weaknesses. How do I know this? I played with and against Jeff in the Tues/Thurs morning group at Campion for a few years. The Mustangs have also gotten younger with Casey Graham at forward, which helps this somewhat older squad. But hey… even the Gamblers are getting older. Meyer is over 40 now, Marrazzo similar, I think, and I remember back when Ryan Lacroix had a flat stomach and zero gray, and when Bergie only had one chin. Father Time takes us all eventually, but part of the beauty of the UVie is that we get to take a last dance with our buddies both on and off the ice. Isn’t that first post-game beer the absolute best beer of the whole week? Fuck yeah, it is.

There were shots taken, on net even, early in this game. Gamblers D Sean Collins made some sweeeet dekes in the neutral zone at 13:10 showing off his Kelly Park-esque skills. Farr made a GREAT save on Max Woods after Woods poked the puck past a Mustangs defender at the blueline and went in for a breakaway making a nice deke, but Farr flashed the R pad for the big save. On the very next play Farr had to come out of the net to play the puck, but he just narrowly got it through the skate and the stick of a pressing Marrazzo who surely would have made him pay if he gained control. Both goalies were sharp early and shots were even at 6-6 at 8:58. Collins made a GREAT pass to Ryan “Goose” LaCroix from the N-zone across to the far blueline for a good scoring chance. After that, Woods hit the post behind Farr and the Gamblers generated a barrage of shots. Woods was set up by Luke Webster at 6:18 for the game’s first goal upstairs on a second chance after Farr made the initial save. One of the UVHL’s best all-time duos of Meyer and Marrazzo saw them score at 5:51 and the shots were 14-7 in favor of the Gamblers and the score 2-0. Unfortunately, I did not see the Mustang’s first goal at 3:30 by Jamal Sabky from Brian Geraty on their 8th shot on net. Sorry, eh.  I guess that’s what Live Barn is for. I might have been distracted by a text of some pretty feet and yummy toes, I dunno… Regardless, it was a 2-1 game and the Mustangs were back in it. Matti “Local Legend” Hartman was making sweet passes to her linemate Sabky throughout the first period. Watch and learn, Fellas. She’s got game. Farr lost his stick behind the net playing the puck and just got it back in time to make a save down low. At the and of the 1st shots were 19-8 Gamblers.

In the 2nd, a bad crash into the net by Woods saw Farr go flying backwards and the net come off. From my angle I couldn’t tell if it was a charge, or if Woods was directed into Farr by one of Farr’s teammates. In any case, it took a few minutes to recover and get everything sorted. Farr was okay, thank God. At the end of the day, it was the Mustangs’ Chris Mudge who received a holding penalty at 12:38 on the play… and he wasn’t happy about it one bit. Chris used his first amendment right of freedom of speech to express his strong displeasure, but it never got personal with the refs and it was left as a 2-minute minor. Gamblers’ defenseman Ryan “Bergie” Bergeron nade a nice rush up the ice 3-on-2 and passed it to the far side to Woods, who then proceeded to make a navel-high return pass back across… Is this football, or soccer? You had ONE job… At 8:24 the Mustangs tied it up with Casey “I’m Waaaay Better Than My Dad” Graham scoring from Matt “I’m Not a Douche” Derouchie. This exciting game was tied at just about the halfway point and the Gamblers were outshooting the Mustangs heavily. Meyer came in on the R side and missed the net wide on the far side… one job… Overall, there were less shots on goal this period but the play continued at a good pace. Bergie got off a weak shot in the slot off a nice pass by Topo Lacroix that was blocked by a Mustangs defender. Farr continued his stellar play with a Hasek-like diving save just getting the end of his glove on it to deny another Gambler’s goal at approx. 5:30. This is definitely in the Save of the Year Category, so please take note Kelly. Marrazzo continued powering to the front of the net like the Marrazzo of old… and Farr made a nice glove save on Marrazzo on the very next play. Woods put the Gamblers up 3-2 at 4:12 fed by Zach Aher right after Woods sailed one over the net in tight. I was about to say “one job”, but Woods made good on the eventual play with the clutch goal and smart positioning to be there for Aher’s puck retrieval and pass. The Mustangs were definitely more competitive and have improved with the new players, but were still missing Warrington, whom I think is the best defenseman in the league and one of the best all-time UVHLers. This was a competitive, close game without Warrington. I wonder what the outcome might have been if he was there. Goose put one over the net at 1:56… in alone on one side of the ice… a slapper over the net… But soon after it was Meyer once again, the captain leading the way, scoring at 1:30 from Webster to put in a back breaking late period goal to make it 4-2 Gamblers. With about 1:15 left, Collins once again showed mad Park-esque skills deking out 2 Mustangs while standing still just around his blueline. Local Legend continued her strong game with a great steal in the neutral zone. Hartmann then made a good rush into the Gamblers’ zone, got boxed out by a defender, then made a siiiick spin pass behind her to Geraghty for the late period goal with only 3 seconds left! The Mustangs sored their own late goal to make it 4-3 and a one-goal game once again getting heavily outshot 30-13!

In the 3rd, Topo came in alone on the R side and Farr had to make a nice save with his R pad. Meyer had several of the Gamblers’ shots early in this period looking to get an insurance goal. Cline made a sweet blocker save in tight down low at approx. 11:45 showing his clutch skills and tenacity. Sabky got sent to the box for a trip at 10:38 and wasn’t happy about it lamenting the player-ref UVHL with many questions about it while in the box. You’re a good guy, Jamal. I relayed the history behind it and how we are autonomous with player-refs and are no longer at the mercy of community refs who at times didn’t take our league seriously. I heard what you were saying, and I know we’re all competitive, but at the same time, I welcome you to ref a UVHL game sometime, eh. In any case, the ‘Stangs killed off the “questionable” penalty in Sabky’s mind. I saw the whole play unfold and even though Sabky didn’t mean to, and it was accidental, a Gamblers’ player went flying getting tripped up by Sabky’s stick. An automatic call that would have been a very bad non-call, in fact. Topo made a fantastic behind the back pass to brother Ryan resulting in a nice save down low by Farr at 6:05. Cline was sharp with his pad and a nice save, too, soon afterwards. Referee Teddy “The Mothman” Pupilla made a good, but late, offside call at 2:26, and the groans were heard by the attacking Gamblers. However, I saw the play and it was the right call. Puplilla had to have the courage to make it late and keep the game fait because if the Gamblers had scored on the play, it wouldn’t have been fair. Nice job, Teddy! In the final minutes of this excellent 1-goal game, there was a GREAT battle for the puck alongside the boards just outside the Gamblers’ zone with the goalie pulled in the Mustangs’ end. The scrum was at least 5 players deep, and Matti Hartman read the play seeing Goose waiting for the puck to squirt free. She came from her side of her red line to support and defend reading the play perfectly. The puck came out and the speedy Goose LaCroix took off with the puck with Hartmann at his L side playing the body and trying to prevent LaCroix from getting any advantage or a breakaway towards the open net. Goose had to slough Hartmann off and juussst got past her putting her down on her back on a fair body-to-body play to go in for the open net goal at 0:55 to seal the deal for the Gamblers. Shots were 43-20 for the Gamblers at game’s end.

MVP: Farr had 37 saves in the loss keeping his team in a 1-goal game getting heavily outshot. Hartmann definitely gets an honorable mention. Meyer and Woods had 2 goal nights, but Meyer’s GWG gets the edge in my book.

LVP: None. Nobody sucked or blew the game for their team. However, you guys can stop whining about any reffing or calls if you haven’t stepped up to ref a game and see what it feels like. I do get why Mudge was super pissed though cuz his goalie got slammed. We kinda need the goalies in the net, guys, so be careful. There ain’t no emergency goalies in the stands, eh.

POST-GAME:
Gambler sighting! Gambler sighting! Houston, we have a Gambler sighting! When I got to the bar around 11:00 there were still 8 Gamblers sitting there cajoling and having a good time. THAT’S part of what the UVie is all about, eh! I got to meet Cline for the first time, make fun of myself and others about happy endings, and talk to some guys I haven’t really been able to talk to since I last played in the UVie 9 years ago. It was so good to see these guys, see how much fun they were having, have a chance to catch up a bit on things, shoot the shit and bust on each other for a while before they filed out to make room for the Tuckies. This looks good on ya, Gamblers! That’s twice you’ve all made it out to Applebee’s and you’re totally off the hook. Now there’s only one team I have to make fun of for the rest of the season: the NO-SHOW MUSTANGS. Vegas has the odds at a very low chance they even make one appearance post-game before the playoffs. Something very special and top secret must be going on in that locker room…

P.S. Apologies for any delay this week for the write-ups. Super Wild Card Weekend definitely had something to do with it, and I’m not gonna promise it won’t happen again next weekend.

Respectfully submitted,

McDefense, aka HKYDOC