UPPER VALLEY HOCKEY LEAGUE

Mustangs vs Whalers - Round 1

It's week 6 and this will be the first meeting between the upstart Mustangs (1-2-0) and revitalized Whalers (2-2-0).  Both teams started the season off with a pair of losses and have since regained their form.  The Mustangs shocked the Upper Valley with a 6-5 shootout win over powerhouse Tuck and the Whalers were equally impressive with a 3-2 win over the Gamblers and then an absolutely dominating 10-0 shutout over the Lumberjacks...that is not a typo, it was 10-0.

The Mustangs are deep and have one of the best back ends in the UVie this season.  With former D1 standouts Maggie LaGue(Robert Morris), Craig Switzer(UNH) & Chris Warrington(Brown) standing guard in front of their goaltender, Colin "Neither Near Nor" Farr.  Their strong defensive core is bolstered by some talented forwards in Matti Hartman(Northeastern), "Mad" Max Gavin & Schuyler St. Germaine.  St. Germaine put up 4 goals in the 6-5 shootout win over Tuck.  

After a devastating start to the season, the Whalers have figured it out and not only put together some solid defensive games, but also started to excel offensively.  Led offensively by Ean "Big-E" Small(3g,3a), Dan "Darth" VeNard(2g,4a) and Kelly "The Mouth" Park(2g,3a).  Their goaltending has also been solid the last two games as Tucker "Big Sexy" Garrity-Hanchett has stellar.  

So where does that information lead us for this game?  Well, if you go by Upper Valley Lore, Tucker was horrible in net on Sunday night, which means he should be lights out on Wednesday.  The big question is whether or not the Mustangs will have all of their studs on the ice as attendance has been hit or miss.

Vegas is unsure, so they're copping out by saying the ODDS are EVEN with an Over/Under of 9 goals scored.

Whalers are Streakin'...down Mustangs

I strive to give credit where credit is due. This week the Mustangs looked wicked shaaaarp in their newly added jerseys and a uniform color (albeit gray) from top to bottom of the lineup. Boom! Nice job, eh! Lookin’ good. Our one fan in the stands and I didn’t have to have our eyeballs hurt and insulted with a mishmash of jersey colors. You guys actually looked like a real team out there! So did the Whalers with Kelly “Fuckin” Paaark out feeling “sick as a dog” as that left only one #8 on the ice for the Whalers. Just stay home, Park. They didn’t even need you tonight.

The Whalers had a new guy tonight, Jason Bogacz, who drove up here all the way from Concord, NH to join his buddies for his first appearance of the season. Apparently, Jason has joined friends before at the Woodstock B league in the past. I hope you found the UVie a step and a half above the two other copycat leagues in the area, eh. As the game started Bogacz was noticeable carrying the play with some poise, speed and good hockey sense. In fact, he got the first two shots of the game, and 3 of his team’s first 5 shots. However, it was the ‘Stangs that struck first at 12:32 when Jamal Sabky bounced one off of Tucker’s glove and it bounced up high into the netting assisted by Will Mudge. I must make a formal apology to the Mustangs elite defenseman #21 Chris Warrington. I had him as #21 Max Gavin as listed on the game sheets in all the previous write-ups and finally got it right tonight. I remember Chris from the UVie and his excellent play years ago, but until I got up close to ask him, I didn’t realize it was him. I had even wondered to myself “Geez, Gavin looks a LOT like Warrington…” Sorry, Chris, My bad. I hope Kelly corrected the submitted game write-ups realizing my mistake cuz I write ‘em and send ‘em and don’t read the final version on the website. If there are any other errors like that for other UVHL players please please please let me know. We’re trying to get all the player and jersey numbers corrected and updated. SO, all that being said… Warrington made a great end-to-end rush with a great pass to St. Germain deep into the offensive zone on a sweet give ‘n go that just missed Warrington’s stick on the return pass. It was Whalers star Dan VeNard in the box for a hook at 4:47 and at the end of the PP a PERFECT pass off the stick of Chris Mudge made it onto St. Germain’s stick from the far blue line for the goal to put the ‘Stangs up 2-0 with only 7 seconds to go o the PP at 2:54. Matti “Local Legend” Hartmann was at center for the Mustangs and got 2 SOG’s in a row on the very next shift after the PPG. The Mustangs just kept on comin’ and as the period ended shots were 13-6 in favor of the M’s.

As the 2nd period started it became apparent to me that both of these squads have improved dramatically compared to the first 3 games of the season. Their team play in all 3 zones and their individual demonstrations of skill have been noticeably better. I had to make several jersey corrections between periods but I think we’ve got it all sorted going forward… as long as Park shows up next week NOT wearing a duplicate #8 for fuck’s sake. If you do, I’m giving the REAL #8 VeNard credit for every single point you get on the scoresheet and YOU can correct it yourself, eh. There. I feel better now after whining and venting. The Whalers turned the momentum their way tying it up with two quick goals to start the 2nd only 47 seconds apart. The first came off the stick of Ean Small from defenseman Chuck Gaede at 13:48. The next was by Colston Allen from James “Delicious Spices” McCormick at 13:01. Suddenly it was 2-2 and a very even contest. Farr made a great play with his stick to stop a Whalers pass to the front of the net to an open and waiting attacker hoping to pounce. Then Farr made an INCREDIBLE Hasek-esque diving save with saves right before and after what is now THE SAVE OF THE YEAR. Inspired by their goalie, the Mustangs came down and scored on the very next play at 8:39 on St. Germain’s second of the game from somebody reported to me as #14. Alas, there was no #14 listed on the ‘Stangs tonight, but I’m sure Kelly will uncover the truth and all credit will be given because HE. LOVES. HOCKEY! It seems that there was an impostor wearing that jersey cuz Kevin Clarkson usually wears #14 but he was actually #37 tonight. Sorry, eh. At the beginning of the season I DID ask all teams to come to me before the puck drops to report any jersey number changes, eh, so fuck you. St. Germain wasn’t finished getting on the scoresheet and added to his totals with a high sticking penalty at 6:45. Teddy “The Mothman” Pupilla made a great defensive stop on Warrington to prevent a shorthanded chance during the Whalers PP. The ever elusive, hard to get, and “very sensual” #14 on the ‘Stangs made a great play with their stick to stop a great pass by the Whalers in front. Once it was back to 5-on-5, VeNard hit the post behind Farr and then Tucker made two good saves in a row at the other end. Ean Small was controlling the puck in the offensive zone generating a good scoring chance for the Whale. They tied it up 3-3 at 4:18 on a goal by “Sweet Spice” McCormick from Jason “New Guy” Bogacsz and Dan “Da Nerd” VeNard. Near the end of the period Bogascz made a nice pass to Dan Feton in front and Farr had to come up with yet another big save to keep it tied. Shots finished 25-19 for the Mustangs at the end of the second.

The Whalers “started on time” in the 3rd with a quick goal at 14:01 by Ean “It’s Not Really” Small (he just got out of the pool, eh) who continued his strong play putting his team up 4-3 assisted by Fenton. I also noticed how there were far fewer missed nets tonight, further evidence of improved individual play now that we’re mid-season and the rust is off. Keep it up and “Do Your Job”, eh, just like Belichick says! Then it was a nice tip in front by Spaulding right into the top corner that Farr had no chance on to make it 5-3 Whalers at 11:51 sent to his “sweet stick” on a great pass by “The Mothman” Teddy Pupilla. Oh, yes. That’s a keeper. Jason “Sweet Stick” Spaulding. Boom. It has a nice ring to it, doesn’t it? Fenton made a nice pass to Small and then on the 1-on-1 Small had a nice backhand chance that was deflected over the net. Fenton kept up his strong play netting an unassisted effort at 8:44. The “new guy”, Bogacz, got sent to the box at 8:27 for elbowing, but the Whalers killed it off. Once their PP was over the Mustangs scored about 2 minutes later at 4:23 from the mysterious #14 on yet another great play generated by Warrington to pull within 2 once again. The ‘Stangs kept pushing and Sabky just missed a deflection chance in front of Tucker in the Whalers net with about 3 minutes to go. A smart coaching move by the Mustangs saw them pull the goalie with 2 and a half left and they had a nice barrage of shots around 1:01 with Tucker needed to make a good save to prevent this from becoming a 1-goal game. Warrington kept up his quarterbacking of the ‘Stangs offense and Hartmann made a nice tip in front but Tucker kept it out of the net. Brandon Chiasson potted the empty netter for the Whale finishing the scoring at 0:04 and the final score 7-4 Whalers. Shots finished 30-24 in favor of the Mustangs in a losing cause.

MVP? Several players had strong games tonight including Colin Farr in net for the Mustangs, Chris Warrington quarterbacking the Mustangs offense combined with exceptional defensive play, and the ever elusive, very sensual and mysterious #14, whoever the fuck that is all in a losing cause. However, this section is not limited to celebrating good play by the losing team. So, who made the difference for the Whalers in this, their THIRD WIN IN A ROW? Well, they had 6 different goal scorers, and timely saves by Tucker, but it was Allen “Mr. 69” Colston with the only 2-goal effort and the eventual GWG so he gets the top vote. This was truly a team effort by the Whalers who are really coming together. They are on a 3-game winning streak and not one single player stood out as the dominant one for me tonight. That means that they are winning by committee and as a team. Together. AND they did it without defensive stalwart Jason “Salt ‘n Pepper” Yehle and the uber talented yet incredibly slow Kelly “Fuckin” Paaaark on defense. Impressive, Whalers. Looks good on ya, eh! Again, I was also impressed with the Mustangs showing up in full, real, authentic ‘Stangs jerseys tonight. Thank you!

LVP? Once again, all of you fucking losers that only stay in the locker room post-game. I have yet to see, meet or talk with a Mustang outside of the rink. Weak. Bad form. Applebee’s is still open after your 30-minute curfew to leave the rink is over, fuckers! 

POST GAME:
These three guys get the special Hockey Doc (HKYDOC) post-game award for showing up not only tonight, but on other nights, too. “The Fabulous and Fantastic” Dan Fenton and Teddy “The Mothman” Pupilla are the ONLY other players other than the Tuckies that I have seen and conversed with more than once at the bar this season. Even the new guy, Jason Bogacz, made it out with his teammates and buddies and has to drive an hour home back to Concord. What’s your excuse? You don’t have one. If Bogacz and Tuck’s Yablong can get just 4-6 hours of sleep and drag ass a little bit on Thursday mornings then SOME of you guys (and girls) can too. Sometimes at least. That’s all I’m asking, fuckers. Just come out some of the fucking time, eh, cuz you’re missing out. Fenton, Pupilla and Bogacz and I had a great time talking about hockey, where they grew up and played, college club experiences for Pupilla, A versus B level hockey, golf, and skiing. They also came into Applebee’s smelling and smiling like they just did a clam bake in one of their cars. S’okay, I love the smell of weed. We got to get to know Lexi, our fantastic bartender and hostess, even better, and Mike the manager as well. I shared the write-ups with Lexi mentioning that I wrote about her on the late game post-game from the 15th. She liked my “trucker mouth”. You’re welcome, Lexi! I do clean up nice sometimes, but only when I have to. We learned that manager Mike is super Catholic and has 6 kids with as many more as God wants on the way and zero plans for a snip job during March Madness and a bag of frozen peas on his nut sack. I have to admit, the family photo of all 6 kids in their jammies was absolutely adorable. Nice work, Mike. I’m a Recovering Catholic myself and did get that snip job, but I’m not holding it against ya in any way. A loving family is a beautiful thing… and perhaps the most beautiful thing in this world. So, c’mon, hockey family: get your asses out post-game sometime. You might even like it. And there’s food! Did I mention food? Beer ain’t gonna replenish your muscle glycogen post-game, eh (more on that in the other write-up). See y’all next week.

McDefense, aka HKYDOC