THE

UPPER VALLEY HOCKEY LEAGUE

February 14th, 2023 - 9:45PM
Union Arena - Woodstock, VT
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Game ID: 1440

Whalers Shock the World, Beat Tuck 6-5

Wow, just fucking wow.  How the hell did Tuck just lose to the Whalers.  I mean really?  Seriously?  Is the world about to end?  Are pigs flying?  Not in a million years should this have been a close game.  Not a snowball's chance in hell did the Whalers have a chance.  If you asked this reporter if the Whalers could win it, I would have started with...."Yes, the Whalers will beat Tuck on the First Day of Never."  

But...the Whaler's captured Lighting in a bottle.  Played the perfect game.  They took the David vs Goliath theme and rode it through 45 minutes of rock solid hockey.  They squeezed blood from a stone, found a needle in a haystack and basically rode their goaltender Tucker "Big Trucker" Garrity-Hanchett to victory.  

But in all reality, what did the Whalers have to lose.  They were officially eliminated from the playoffs back in August, they just didn't know it.  It was their last game of the season, and they put it all on the line.  Tuck on the other hand may have been too relaxed, taking the Whalers lightly.  They had a huge night from Aiden "Rocky" Balboni, who almost doubled his goal total for the year with a hatrick and added a helper.  The Whalers kept Sam "Pay Day" Gray, Stefan "Saucy" Soucy, Luke "Travis" Stickel, Jon Carkeek and Seamus "O'Nasty" O'Neil to a combined 2 goals and 6 points.  Shocking since those 5 players combine for an average of over 5 goals and 12 points per game.

The Whalers brought a full 3 lines to do the dirty work, and the extra bodies paid dividends as two rookies got their first UVHL goals.  Scotty "Too Hotty" Christian netted two and Colston "All The Time" Allen finally got on the scoreboard as well.  After the game, Christian, the 67 year old rookie, was overzealous with joy as he downed his Arthritis and Macular Degeneration medications with a 5th of Crème De Menthe.  "It felt amazing.  I couldn't feel my hands nor see the puck on either goal, so I let my spidey senses guide me."

Tuck opened the scoring with a pair of goals in the first period off the sticks of Balboni & Soucy before the Whalers bounced back with a pair of their own midway through the frame.  Ryan Longfield and Nate "The Great" Robinson were the shooters.  Christian then went off in the second period with pair of goals to create separation before a late powerplay goal from Stickel made it a one goal game.  Allen used those long legs after picking up a turnover at the tops of the circles in his own end and firing a twisted wrister past Tuck's Brendan "Killer" Kelley from 30 feet out to regain the lead early in the first.  Balboni cleaned up the garbage with 4:37 to play giving Tuck hope before Bentley "Boomtown" Boonyaharn laid the smack down, picking a defender's pocket and breaking in all alone on Kelley to regain the 2 goal lead.  Rocky Balboni wasn't done though, bouncing one off of TGH from behind the net with 1:30 to play, but it wasn't enough as the Whalers locked shit down and kept Tuck off the board.  It was the Whaler's superbowl, a carrot to bring them back next year.  Maybe it was Tuck's philanthropic nature, giving the Whalers some charity so they wouldn't self harm themselves over the long, hot, hockey-less summer.  Maybe...

LEAGUE PICK 'EM
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Tuck
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Whalers
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THREE STARS

Aidan Balboni

GOALS: 3
POINTS: 4

Scott Christian

GOALS: 2
POINTS: 2

Tucker Garrity-Hanchett

GA: 5
SAVES: 38
SAVE%: 0.884

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