UPPER VALLEY HOCKEY LEAGUE

Tuck a duck, cluck cluck cluck

ODDS:	Tuck by 1 goal
OVER/UNDER:	8.5 goals

This one is tough to call. The Tuckies have been off for 2 weeks, probably drinking and banging strippers, oh wait, they are business school nerds, so they were probably reading literature and crossword puzzles, but most likely they weren't working on their hockey game.

The Brew Crew has been the epitome of inconsistency, but are always a tough team and able to steal any game any night.

Tuck has won 3 of 4 this year, but all but the first game of the season, 8-2 win for Tuck, have been 1 goal wins.

This should be another close game, depending on whether or not the Brewer's Top Guns can return to form. Specifically The Love Doctors, Nick "The Stick" Bayley & Christian "Tunnel Vision" Isaac. Bayley hasn't been the same since spending 2 months straight at the Bunny Ranch. Pete "The Meat" Bartline will need to be big in net tonight if the Tuckie's have their their potent offense clicking.

As usually the Tuckies will be anchored by the excellent goaltending tandem of Stevie "They Killed" Kenning & Dan "In Your Facey" Yacey as well as a stacked defensive unit featuring Ryan "The Govenator" McGovern, Ryuchi "Sure You Can" Kikuchi & Andrew "Hellboy" Helming.

This one will be a bit higher scoring, but Tuck should walk away with the 5-4 win.

Tuck dismantles the Brewers 8-1

Tuck opened a GIANT can of whoop-ass on Pete "The Meat" Bartline and the Brewers that started just 32 seconds into the game and lasted for 45 long minutes. Tuck's Dan "The Man" Yacey was good in net, turning away 34 of 35 shots, but despite the high volume of rubber put on net, most were from the outside and Yacey rarely left a rebound for the hapless Brewers to pounce on. At the other end of the ice, Bartline turned away 32 of 40 shots himself, but had to work much harder than Yacey, being called upon for a dozen or so huge saves and watching 5 or 6 goals go past him that he had absolutely no chance to save.

Both teams were missing some crucial cogs to their offensive machines. Tuck was without Simon McKay, Andrew Helming & Derek Nowak while the Brewers were missing Nick Bayley & Christian Isaac.

Tuck set the tone in the first minute on a great play from Jordy Barnett & Jimmy Hay. Barnett, a defenseman, made a great pass at the top of the Brewers zone, across the rink into the far corner where Hay quickly fired the puck through the crease to Stevie Bates who roofed it over Barty. Bartline was at his best in the first period, shutting down Halsey "Turn Your Head And" Coughlin on 2 clear breakaways and about 5 other solid scoring chances from Tuck. The Brewers managed to tie the game up with 5:52 to go in the first when Brock "BB Gun" Barton picked the pocket of a Tuck defenseman in his own zone, and raced in all alone on a breakaway, beating Yacey with a quick snap shot low glove side. That was about as good as it was going to get for the Brewers as Tuck's Tony "The Tiger" Cape scored in the final minute of play in the first and never looked back.

Tuck added 3 more goals in the second frame to pad their lead. Defenseman Ryan "The Govenator" McGovern jumped into the offense, worked a beautiful give-and-go with Bates and beat Bartline through his gaping man-5-holio. You could have fit a keg through his legs on this one as it was more like a man-hole than a 5-hole, but maybe he was a little saddle sore from riding Bayley all week. It was around this time that the Brewers made a strategic move, where they put defenseman Garren "Potential Turnover" Poirier on forward....not for offense, but because he had already turned the puck over 15 times in the first 20 minutes of play, leading us to the next play. Tony Cape added his 2nd of the night, unassisted, with an assist coming from the Brewer's Garren "Potential Turnover" Poirier. Poirier actually made a nice play in the Tuckie zone as he lost 2 attackers and then headed toward the blueline where his defenseman Brock Barton was waiting patiently for the easy pass with Cape right on his ass, but instead of dishing the puck he almost ran into Barton before Cape chipped the puck away and went in on a breakaway, DESTROYING Bartline's ego with a quick move and shot. The "Mad Twins" connected on another goal, this time Bates feeding Hay with 1:29 to go in the 2nd period.

Hay added his team leading 20th goal of the season mid-way through the third frame with a power play goal, this time from Johnny "The Big Red Dog" Clifford to put Tuck up 6-1. Hay found Bates again with 6:55 to go in the game as Tuck started to pull their foot off the gas and work the puck around a bit more. Cape closed out his hat trick at 2:25 with his 7th of the season after picking up a rebound in front of the net, whirling around and sliding a perfect backhander inside the post. That hat trick earned Cape a player of the week nomination.

The Brewers were a bit outclassed tonight by a well rested Tuck team. Tuck had taken back to back forfeits the past two weeks while they were on Spring Break, losing their 2nd place playoff bye to the Nordiques in that time period. Maybe they were pissed, maybe they were well fed at home, maybe they were just well rested after some tough exams. Any way you look at it, the Tuckies dominated tonight. The Brewers looked rusty. Tons of choppy broken plays, turnovers and mishaps in their defensive end.

 

Team:	Time:	Type:	Player:	Details:
1st PERIOD
TCK	14:28	Goal	Bates, Steve(4)	Assist(s): Hay, James(12) Barnett, Jordan(3)
BRE	05:52	Goal	Barton, Brock(4)	Assist(s): none
TCK	00:59	Goal	Cape, Tony(5)	Assist(s): Clifford, John(7) Barnett, Jordan(4)
2nd PERIOD
TCK	11:40	Goal	McGovern, Ryan(6)	Assist(s): Bates, Steve(9)
TCK	10:08	Penalty	McGovern, Ryan(3)	2 minutes for Hooking
TCK	02:20	Goal	Cape, Tony(6)	Assist(s): none
TCK	01:29	Goal	Hay, James(19)	Assist(s): Bates, Steve(10) Coughlin, Halsey(12)
3rd PERIOD
BRE	09:47	Penalty	Barton, Brock(7)	2 minutes for Interference
TCK	08:20	Goal	Hay, James(20)	Assist(s): Clifford, John(8)
TCK	06:55	Goal	Bates, Steve(5)	Assist(s): Hay, James(13) Coughlin, Halsey(13)
TCK	02:25	Goal	Cape, Tony(7)	Assist(s): Barnett, Jordan(5)

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Game Comments:
JTStally Hanover, NH Registered: Posts: 159	Goaltending? Mar 20th, 2010 11:57 PM Which goaltender is taking an extended Spring Break and which one should we expect to see between the pipes for the Businessmen?
Garrentee Killington, VT Registered: Posts: 20	Hopefully... Mar 22nd, 2010 06:54 PM we get a goaltender at all...Im not going through what we went through last week!! Fucking Hadley!!
rgrunds Stowe, VT Registered: Posts: 376	I love goaltending Mar 22nd, 2010 08:22 PM it's really fun.
hkydoc WRJ, VT Registered: Jan 2004 Posts: 517	Man-hole, not 5-hole! Mar 26th, 2010 07:23 PM HA HA HA HA! Great line! I fucking love it, Parky! McD