UPPER VALLEY HOCKEY LEAGUE

Gamblers Look To Run Win Streak to 7

The Gamblers(-195) have been on fire since back to back losses to the Whalers & Tuck in November.  Since then they have ripped off 6 straight wins, outscoring their opponents 30-9.  Led by their goaltender Evan "The Net Condom" Cline who leads the league with a stingy 2.80 gaa.  While a 92% efficiency rate would be scary for a condom, it's a scary good number for a save percentage in Men's League...which is another stat Cline leads the league in.

Cline's counterpart in this matchup, Ryan "The Liberator" Libbey doesn't quite have the same numbers....sitting 4th out of 5 goalies in the UVHL with a 4.70 gaa & .819 save percentage.  Those numbers are not indicative of his play, as the Lumberjacks(+210) give up more high danger scoring opportunities than anyone else in the league.

The G-Men have won both games this season, 8-3 on Nov 29th and 5-1 on Dec 20th.  The Lumberjacks are 1-2-1 in their last 4 games.  They are led by their captain Jay "The Zamboni" Zanleoni who leads the league in mountain bike rides and snarky comments.  Zanleoni has put up a dreadful 2g & 2a in 6gp.  Offensively the 'Jacks have always leaned on Jordy "McBreakaway" McGee, who is elegantly falling through his thirties.  McGee's 18pts are 4th best in the UVHL.  

The Gambler's are led by Zach "The Tinder Tickler" Aher who leads the league in "Most Swipes Right on Tinder" and "Best Shoulder Pads".  Offensively Aher leads the league in "Most pucks dumped in the corner" and "F*cks Yelled" in the O-Zone.  Max "The Woodchuck" Woods (16pts) Will "The Thrill" Meyer (14pts) lead the Gamblers.  Their defense isn't too shabby either with Sean "Copland" Collins and Ryan "The Boogeyman" Bergeron both putting up 10pts while playing stellar defense in front of Cline.

This should be another easy win for the Gamblers.  Vegas says the Gamblers win by 3 goals with an over under of 9 Goals Scored.

Lumberjacks Chopped Down by Gamblers.

No fans littered the stands on this night of freezing rain, subs, clock malfunction, and an interesting start with just one ref: Kelly “Fuckin’” Park. I inherited the score clock with an automatic buzzer every 2 minutes that was FUCKING ANNOYING by whatever useless nimrod(s) were using it beforehand. At least the music was working and nobody fuck-fucked with that this time at least, Round Eye. I grabbed some new but old songs, and started it off with some Pearl Jam to get the rink rockin’.

In the 1st, Max Woods made a nice drop pass to Bergie and then Woods found the top corner off the rebound over the glove of Libbey at 10:08 to start the scoring about 5 minutes in. There was a goal mouth scramble and Libbey laid outstretched trying to make yet another save but the puck got poked in at 8:02 by Meyer from Deary to make it 2-0 Gamblers. Fenton eventually showed up to join Park in the reffing department around 6:08. Shots were 10-4 at 4:29 for the Gamblers, but the Lumberjacks started off getting 4 out of the 5 or 6 first shots in the game as I recall and momentum changed quickly. The Gamblers got two quick goals at 3:29 and 2:48 to go up 4-0 and shots were 14-4. Ryan “Goose” LaCroix scored the first of those from sub Alex “Am I Better As a Goalie or a Forward?” Dodds and Luke “Just Call Me Gretzky” Deary. Dodds added to his totals with the second of the two goals and Parky has his work cut out for himself to research who, if anyone, garnered the assists on the multi-positional and talented player’s marker. Meyer jumped on a rebound at 1:28 from Marrazzo and Deary and the score was 5-0 and shots 16-7 all in favor of the Gamblers.

In the 2nd, one of the rink employees came over to fix the clock. Thank you! Some dumbass had the auto horn on and they had to delay the start of the high school game before us because of the clock snafu. One job… I’m amazed at times at the lack of competence in our society. I don’t know how we just don’t totally collapse each and every day into Lord of the Flies… Piggy’s got the conch!... but I digress… I was made to wonder if the Lumberjacks’ difficulties tonight were related to Jay Zaneloni’s absence? The play didn’t seem that far tilted in the Gamblers’ favor. However, the number of shots and the capitalization on those shots around the goalmouth clearly made the difference. The brothers LaCroix combined for the goal at 13:24 getting the period started off right for the G-spots with Ryan getting his second of the game. Again, it didn’t really feel like the G’s were dominating the whole game end to end, they just really kicked ass on the scoresheet and in front. At 10:52 Marrazzo made a nice pass in front that Deary tipped wide. Shots were 24-10 @ 8:28. Lumberjacks superstar Jordan McGee made a great play to feed a teammate in front of the net who just whiffed on the shot. Marrazzo pushed the puck ahead in the neutral zone and split the twin towers of D, Frisch and Gattie, to go in in a hard-earned breakaway only to miss the net wide R on the shot, but the puck somehow came back out in front on the ensuing play and Marrazzo scored on the second chance. McGee showed his skills on a sweet drag move in front at 5:46 that found the back of the net from Gattie and Jared “LaBelle Balls” and the shutout was broken. Libbey made 3 good saves in a row at 5:11, but Dodds found the back of the net from Marrazzo and Deary. LaBelle made a great block on a pass in the ‘Jacks slot to stop a 2-on-1, and then Marrazzo made another nice pass to the front of the net for a tip and save by Libbey. Meyer made a nice pass back to Dodds at the point and created a good scoring chance, and then Dodds had another shot at it with a screamer from the point. Dodds continued his strong play and netted a backhander at 1:14 from Marrazzo and Deary, who got at least his 5th assist of the game! Eat your heart out, Gretz! Shots were 37-16 and the score 9-1 at the conclusion of the 2nd.

In the 3rd, Woods made a nice shot up high from inside the circle saved by Libbey’s R shoulder, the Woods had a breakaway and his backhander was almost saved by Libbey’s outstretched stick at 14:00. McGee made another sweet outside-in move for a chance, and then the ‘Jacks made several nice in-zone passes to one another for a quality scoring chance turned away by Cline. With the score out of hand and the game out of reach the guys requested running time with 7:34 to go. They asked at the start of the 3rd, but I said, and felt, that they paid for their ice time and deserved to have it. I get it though… it’s no fun for either team when a game ends up like that. We start thinking about the post-game beer more than the game, and sexy time with the Mrs. after we get home.. or Palmela Handerson for most of you cuz she never says no. Like, what do you do? Do you stop playing or trying? We all want to compete and have fun, but still want to respect our opponents who might just be having an off day. Should we pause the game, swap a few players and jerseys and just play for fun like we do in pick-up hockey if one team ends up stacked? It’s a tough call. In the end, Parky said let it run and that’s what we did. At 7:00 Woods scored from the brothers LaCroix. In the final minutes, Bergie made a great defensive play forcing Frisch to the side boards coming over to help his D partner on the 1-on-2 Frisch was barreling in on to shut it the fuck down. Never giving up, McGee backchecked hard to stop Marrazzo’s pass in front to stop another Gamblers’ scoring chance. Topo LaCroix scored with 1:11 remaining on a breakaway 5-holio and the score ended 12-1 and shots 47-23.

MVP:  Alex Dodds had at least 3G, 1A, and Deary had at least 5A.  I can say this because many assists were not given out during the game in real time. Parky should have the true totals after a detailed review of the Live Barn feed.

LVP?:  Can I say it? You know what I’m thinking… After a team effort like that I need to call out the Lumberjacks with the two exceptions of Jordan McGee and Ryan Libbey who was hung out to dry by his team. I hope the post-game beers helped ease the sting of this abortion of a hockey game by the Lumberjacks. At least they lost with class and no one got pissed off or took ay stupid penalties. In fact, there were absolutely no penalties assessed in this game.

POST-GAME:
The Gamblers came through AGAIN!  It’s a 2-game streak, boys! There were at least 9 Gamblers at the bar when I showed up, and it was so good to hang out with some of my former leaguemates and friends back in the day. Meyer continues to amaze me… He reffed all weekend at the Tuck tournament, shows up for Wednesday night hockey, and then planned to get up early for the 7:30 AM Campion skate on Thursday morning driving a half hour from Bradford. How does he do this in his early 40’s??? And with 2 kids now in hockey, and a backyard rink? You’re one of my hockey heroes, Willy. Some of us were reminiscing about the start of the UVie back in ’03-04 and the original teams, the expansion to 6 teams, and the heyday of the league in years 3-7 back in Woodstock where the competitiveness was high, the rivalries were good, and everyone went out after the games. This isn’t to say that the league isn’t awesome now, because it is. Us old farts are just prone to remembering it all with rose colored glasses as the song goes… We all only have so much time to play the sport we love, so soak it up while you can boys (and ladies)!

Respectfully submitted,
McDefense, aka HKYDOC