THE

UPPER VALLEY HOCKEY LEAGUE

December 14th, 2010 - 6:30PM
Union Arena - Woodstock, VT
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Game ID: 701

Dead River Overpowers Brew Crew 11-6

Dead River & the Brewers headed into week 10 separated by 1 point in the standings, and Dead River came out as the clear cut dominant team. Robbie "Burger" Pattison was dynamic tonight, amassing 6 goals and an assist in the tilt. With this one game, Pattison almost doubled his goal production for the season ending the night with 13 goals in 7 games.

Rubber was flying all over the rink tonight with a combined 102 shots on goal and 85 total saves, both goalies were probably having nightmares later that night of giant vulcanized monsters barreling down on them. The Brewer's Matty "Biscuit Eater" Crowson stopped 46 shots in the loss and will probably refuse to speak to his defenseman until next Tuesday's game. Greg "Feather" Feiden turned away 39 of his own shots en route to the win.

This was actually a close game through most of the first 2 periods until the Brewers imploded with just over 3 minutes to play when Pattison decided to turn up the intensity.

The first period was the best played from both sides, without a single penalty and only 3 goals scored, the period had a nice flow to it. There were 30 total shots in the period with Crowson seeing the majority, stopping 16 of 18 pucks. Chris "Browntown" Warrington opened up the scoring at 9:42 with a quick snapper off the post and in.

The Brewers tied the game at 5:02 when Chris "The Old Johnson" Johnson flipped a pass out of his own zone to Chris "Doobie" Dubin at center ice, then crashed the net for a return backdoor pass. Both Johnson & Dubin had respectable nights with 3 points apiece and only -10 each on the night.

Dead River jumped out 2-1 on a Ricky Golden "Showers" dangle & toe-drag clinic on 3 Brewers before firing freezing Crowson with a hard pass to Tommy "PIM KING" Scull on the near post for a redirection into the cage.

END OF THE FIRST: Dead River 2, Brew Crew 1

The second period got a bit crazy with 8 goals scored. Dead River jumped out to a quick 4-1 lead with a backdoor pass from Pattison to Duggan and then Pattison cleaning up some garbage left in the crease by Crowson.

The Brewers tallied just 34 seconds later on a tic-tac-toe play from Danny "Super Chunk" Charette at the far point to Brian "Slow As Shit" Smith behind the net to Cort "Fist Pumpin'" Pomeroy in the slot. Dubin scored at 6:14 for Mr. Large & In Charge Dan Charette with a snapshot off the post and in from only to have Pattison do the same exact thing at the opposite end exactly 30 seconds later. Brewers Rookie Johnny "The Glide" Jacey cleaned up some garbage of his own with 3:59 to play only to see Pattison hammer home a rebound on the powerplay less than a minute later to complete his hat trick....but he was only warming up. Pattison scored another goal before the period ended giving Dead River a healthy 7-4 lead heading into the last frame.

END OF THE SECOND: Dead River 7, Brewers 4

The Brewers pressed hard in the third period trying to make up some ground on Dead River but were ultimately outscored 4-2 in the final 15 minutes. Warrington scored first as he broke in on Garren "teed Penalty" Poirier. Poirier wrapped him up, taking the penalty as they both headed behind the net, only to see Warrington retrieve the loose puck, cut to the front of the net and burn Crowson stick side.

The Brewers scored a pair of goals to cut the score to 8-6 with an Aaron "Mandingo" Mancuso 30 foot blast off of a Dead River turnover. Johnson scored on a Feiden turnover behind his own net as he tried firing the puck behind his own net, only to see his best efforts go 4 feet. Johnson picked up the puck at the end boards and brought the puck to the front of the net as Feiden dove, knocking the puck in his own net and sending Johnson ass over tea-kettle into the crease.

Pattison scored his 5th of the night just 28 seconds later when "Mean" Dean Cashman hit Duggan on the back door. Crowson made an amazing save as he traversed the crease, but the puck squeaked underneath him and sat in the crease for Pattison to poke into the empty net.

The best play of the game came with 5:30 remaining when another puck made it under Crowson and sat in the crease. The Brewer's Garren Poirier dove into the crease and tried pushing the puck back to his goaltender but sent it straight into his own net, only to hear Dead River's captain / man-whore / team masseuse, Greg Hadley, start screaming that Poirier covered the puck in the crease and that it should be a goal. Not realizing that the puck went into the net, Hadley continued to explain what his level 1 reffing clinic taught him, and how his team deserved an automatic goal...in a 9-6 game with 5 minutes to play. Hadley blushed, went the bench, felt shame and then touched himself to feel better.

Pattison closed out the scoring with 41 seconds to play after taking a pass from his goalie, broke in all alone on Crowson and made him look like Helen Keller as he cut back on him and roofed the puck on his backhand.

END OF REGULATION: Dead River 11, Brewers 6

Pattison was SICK, he had a couple of garbage goals, but the good players are always in the right place at the right time. "Mean" Dean Cashman had 3 assists to move into a tie to lead the league in helpers with 15.

Dead River has put together back to back games where their offense has exploded, and if they can figure out how to protect their own end, they can be dangerous.
LEAGUE PICK 'EM
 60%
Labatt Blues
40% 
Brewers
5 PICKS
THREE STARS

Rob Pattison

GOALS: 6
POINTS: 7

Evan Duggan

GOALS: 1
POINTS: 4

Chris Warrington

GOALS: 2
POINTS: 3

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